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OK Seb, been lookin at your website for ages and finally want to do something about it. Married for the last 20 years, now seperated for a year,  and always wanted to try sucking a cock, being sucked, want to try being fucked up the arse, want to try fucking another guy. Want to kiss an unshaved guy, want to smell another guys arm pits, that masculin smell, want to suck a guys balls, lick him all over. I am 43, VERY fit, good body, 5ft 7 tall, bald, well, keep it number one cropped. Problem is I am petrified of doing it. Your website has been amazing but I cant take the first step. I am paranoid of getting HIv and HEPATITIS, what do I do, where can I find the right guy in a similar situation as me who is new to this and wants to try everything that I do as safely as possible? Its really hard for guys like me who are new to this but worried about it and really want to try this, I have to do this but where do I start? Any advice you can give me to help me take that step would be so well appreciated. Please get back to me and let me know what you think I should do or where to find a guy to do this with. Kindest wishes and many thanks. Steph

Seb Cox Replies : Do your homework mate. Make an appointment to see an advisor at your local sexual health clinic. They will explain to you about vaccanation against hepatitus and about safe sex in realtion to HIV. You then need to set intelligent rules for yourself in relation to safer sex. Keep well away from the commercial "gay scene" in my opinion because of the rise in the popularity of Bareback(unsafe) sex. When you've got time go and chill out somewhere you can relax with other men. I find a great place for me is my local turkish baths. Engage with other men that you find sexy. Talk to them. Invite them for a drink. Enjoy their company, men really are fantastic company. Enjoy the time your spending with them , if sex is supose to happen it will. I would prefer to spend an hour having an intimate drink with a sexy man than have untold amounts of sex with someone I really didn't fancy. This is your sacred journey, the only one who can really help you is yourslef and g(o)d. All you have to do is ask him. I wish the best of love, lust and luck m8.  A big hug for you.

My advice is to take the plunge and meet a guy that you feel comfortable with and take it slowly as you need to. Have some good fun but remember to keep it safe and remain within your comfort zone. You should also think about setting up some boundries beforehand and if you still feel comfortable then its ok to continue ahead. Remember to have plenty of fun and enjoy yourself. Good luck in your ventures. flexi - bill

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